it's a non issue for me...

but someone else raised it with me....

so the partner of my major client calls me today; this is rare, so I did wonder what must be up for her to call me

she starts by saying "i meant to chat to you about this last week at dinner but there wasn't an opportunity" and "it's a non issue for me but DH raised it and I didn't want you to be blindsided if he mentions it to you"

that's actually really nice that she thought of that - went onto tell me that in the past if this had happened to her she would have gone into amygdala hijack so wanted to give me the heads up - again, this is good

so basically, the client is looking for a new venue for one of their programs; the current venue, who have made it clear to me they are devastated to be losing the work, told me they'd love to continue to support the program and would be open to discussing a price cut

all i did was pass this on to the client, and he's told my major client that this is somehow a breach of guidelines!

what absolute bullshit...all i've done is pass on a message, which I'd already relayed to her (my major client)...

as she and i discussed, we think he's being overly sensitive and there's something going on in the background that is driving his reaction - and it is a reaction!

she describes him as being very transparent and she reckons that's come back to bite him in the bum a few times; and now, he's carrying on like a pork chop because of an email I sent him whose only intention was to share with him what i'd been told...

people man!

you think that you work through an issue, and you do, and then another one comes up

for me, this is about really (and I mean really) examining my reaction (and that younger self who assumes she is in the wrong) to these sorts of situations...

but of course, the old me, the one that I fear had been suffering with anxiety in the last few months (although that has lifted) has already gone to that place of 'oh well, if they fire you....'

really! i'm going to let the paranoia of the clients client, with no basis in fact, and probably of his own doing, let me worry about whether or not my client is going to terminate my services...

yep, no wonder i sometimes feel anxious....

really gotta learn to be on my own side more...

that said, if I do see him and he does bring it up, i'll say 'thanks for letting me know, my intention was only to pass on what i thought was relevant information to you, and i'm sorry'

but really, what am I sorry for? I'm always coaching people and trying to get them to examine what they are sorry about?

what am i sorry about?

sorry that i tried to share with him what i thought was useful info...nope!
sorry that he has misunderstood my intention in sharing....nope!

so maybe it won't be a sorry, it'll be an 'i was just passing on information that i thought you'd find helpful'....

anyway, trick will be to try and not let it eat away at me....