hasn't helped
that i think my body is also fighting the flu
i feel heavy
hearted, ripped off, sad, angry, as if so much has been taken from me, and
tired, tired of having to keep this secret...
yep, i'm over
it! it's true...and so once again, the long journey of trying to 'integrate'
(let's go with that instead of get over, or move on, or whichever other
expressions seem to be the norm) it all...
kinda sad, that
today, for the first time in a long long long time, i realised that i am
unlikely to have kids now, and mostly i'm ok with that, but today, i really
wasn't
and i feel like
Chris has stolen that from me...kids, a happy and normal relationship,
marriage, ability to trust etc etc
bastard...
yep, so because
of that, i feel heavy of heart today, and honestly, wishing things might have
turned out differently...
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