i am good at grey...usually, or historically, i have been reasonably black and white in my thinking about certain things - it's either one way, or the other, but today i decided to go with the flow and i think it may have been a valuable lesson...
soo after yesterday's posts (epiphany and bugged) of course i had to decide if i would communicate with him...we had a few texts, he called this morning and i told him i wasn't sure i wanted ongoing communication with him...
amazingly i think he gets it and he was (first time ever) not inappropriate in any way...asked about the job, congratulated me, showed genuine interest in understanding what i'd be doing etc etc...
and it struck me this afternoon sometime, that it may (and i say may because i am not decided yet) be ok to consider a friendship with him...as long as i don't think of it as anything else...
so, being able to separate the previously held fantasy (which as i said isn't dead but is certainly dying and has definitely no longer got a hold over me) from the current reality, might make it feasible to be friends...
i'm not sure how i feel about that and so i'm just sitting with it...staying grey, as it were...
hmmmm, but of course, that means, for now at least, there will be no unfriending on FB or otherwise!
ps i still think his timing is uncanny, but perhaps i'm creating that cosmic energy that makes him make contact when i'm trying to cut it off...??
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