writing...

so i had a writing course today - in the last 3 months it's the 9th one i've been to...it was good! i go to these things with a coupla things in mind...obviously, to get some tips about writing and in particular how on earth to find a way to get this novel to hang together...turns out i may have some blockage due to writing a) in the first person and b) having a lot of myself in the main character...so gonna do some thinking about that...second thing is to meet other writers, although, on the whole, today's bunch were not my sort of people...of course, i would be lying if i said i didn't hope to meet some nice men at these things but it seems, largely, that writing courses are filled with middle aged women...

oh fuck! does that make me a middle aged woman? i guess in definitional terms i probably am...i'm 42 which given an average life span of...what is the average life span these days? probably means if i'm not middle aged, then i'm fast approaching it...

sigh

so, no men to speak of, no people i particularly want to keep in touch with but some fabulous and practical tips! actually, great teacher - Emily Maguire - turns out she's something of a feminist and has at least 4 published works - wow!

but it was a tough day - i woke up yesterday with a headache and felt a bit sick/dizzy, didn't feel much better when i woke up today so literally had to drag myself out of bed and over to Rozelle...managed to stick it out, and despite having good intentions to walk when i got home i was simply too tired...

even though it's now 9.51pm, i was ready for bed at 7.35pm...and of course being tired and thinking or navel gazing as perhaps it can be accurately described, don't actually make a great combination for me...

i had a sudden thought as i was watching the tennis and eating yet another piece of chocolate (really gotta kick the habit for chocolate and/or biscuits...especially once i am in full time employ was walking every day will no longer be possible)...what if i NEVER meet anyone and have a long term relationship...is that going to mean my life will have been a failure?

(note to everyone else: if you fall into that category, i don't think you are a failure, but this is something i seem to measure myself by)...

soooo best i go to bed before the navel gazing becomes even more deep and meaningful and i find myself depressed at my own assessment of where things are at!

nite x

ps next one is 750!