friends...

i'm just so fortunate to have the group of friends that i have...

they're all pretty different and when they come together i wonder if they'll get on - coz mostly, the only thing they have in common, is me...

but you know, i was having a great chat to one of them tonight about vulnerability (a subject i have long been working on with my therapist) and she is having some similar issues, and i realised that since Chris turned up last year, i have ventured into being vulnerable with them (and him, but as you know that didn't go so well...) and it's been great...

to be able to share, rather than hide, my true feelings and what was going on for me, to know they wouldn't judge me but rather, listen, offer advice and be there to support me, no matter which decision i made, and basically to not have to go thru it all on my own...

yep, seems i may have turned the corner on not being able to be vulnerable - and you know what? not only have i felt better, but my friendships with these amazing women (and i say women, coz even though i have one amazingly good male friend...he's been overseas for all of this stuff so haven't really had the chance to discuss it with him) have become so much better...

deeper, more real, authentic even (and i know, some people don't like that word)...and all because i gave more of myself...

amazing really, well not really - coz giving more we get more and i know this, but i guess i have been so afraid to 'give more' of myself in relationships due to my history...

i love it when we try something new, when we venture into the unknown and adopt a courageous approach and even if we only put our big toe in that water, at least we do...

sooo it would seem the tide has turned! vulnerability (as well as grey) is the new black! and i'm loving it!

so to my wonderful friends, thank you - thank you for being you, for being there, for being here for me, for letting me learn to be vulnerable with you, and for our friendship...you ALL mean the world to me

nite x