so, here I go! i have been toying with blogging for a while - i figure that it's a natural progression from writing a diary, which i did when i was younger (and i mean much younger) so i'm playing with it - and if you don't see another entry well it's because i'm either not enjoying writing it or i have nothing to write about, or i'm simply too busy! of course there is still a part of me that thinks blogging is self indulgent - but hey, indulgence is my middle name so i thought i could give it a go before i knock it!
i expect (or perhaps it's just hope) that i'll get better at deciding what to write but right now i have a topic - i was fortunate enough to have something to write about at hand!
so i'm studying to be a counsellor and today was the first of a five day 'alcohol and other drugs' course - great educator, mainly great students.........oh wait - there wouldn't be a good story if they were all good!
so this guy turns up late, dishevelled (don't you love that word?) and lucky for me (of course I didn't realise this at the time) was that he was a sex addict - yep you read it correctly - and of course this is not something you expect to find out when you first meet someone but he seems to be salivating for an opportunity when he can say 'i haven't been to an AA meeting, but i've been to an SAA meeting'.........so it gets better - to my horror i find i have to 'partner up' with him so we can get to know each other and then introduce each other to the class - doesn't sound so bad right?
wrong! he spends the entire few minutes looking down my shirt (mental note to me - don't wear anything remotely revealing to school again), tells me that as i'm only in my twenties (i've just turned 39!!!) that i couldn't understand, and that when i tell him i'm actually nearly 40 he says 'you obviously haven't had a hard life then, otherwise you wouldn't look like that'........
to be honest i was floored, it's not often my mouth opens and nothing follows - but today i just couldn't come up with anything - all i could think was what a judgemental wanker this guy was/is.....and thankfully the thoughts stayed in my head!
so then it gets worse - he asks me what i do, where i live, do i have pets, stupid inane questions that nobody else is going to be remotely interested in hearing about (all of these questions i dance around by giving vague answers) and then introduces me by saying i'm nearly 40 and love my job at Westpac bank!!!! charming! at this point i notice that i still have more than 6 hours to endure his presence next to me - his continual grunting, my many attempts to avoid eye contact (my dad would totally understand this!) which ends up giving me a stiff neck, finding any reason not to enter conversation with him and wondering why he had to sit next to me - kinda the same as when someone who really should have purchased 2 airplane seats has the 1 seat next to me, and yet, seems to be occupying most of my seat......guess i did something bad in a past life!
so then we're having a discussion in the afternoon and one of our colleagues is asking a question about terminology and names! if we call people addicted to alcohol alcoholics, what do we call people addicted to sex??? genuinely honest question from her - english is her second language and i don't think she understands that there is simply not a name (as far as i'm aware) for sex addicts - they are simply called sex addicts - so you know who chimes in and says actually there is: the men we call stars and the women we call whores! the entire class lets out a collective gasp, the educator does her best to admonish him without swearing (well done her) and a couple of people tell him he's out of line........
can you believe it? this person is enrolled in a counselling course - to counsel other people - people who might really need help and guidance without judgement and with empathy - is he for real?????
anyway it's getting close to my bed time so as i gracefully (with all the grace of a nearly 40 year old!) step off my soapbox i realise that in fact it's a good thing i met him today..............as up until then i have considered myself pretty judgemental, but right now i'm feeling good about myself! knowing that the things he said today, underpinned by the attitudes he has about life and people, are nothing compared to how i see the world :-)
on a sadder note, despite everything (and by everything i mean education, societal changes, so called progress), there are still some very idiotic and ignorant people out there..........any wonder guns are legal in america!
here endeth the maiden voyage.......until next time
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3 comments:
I classify the sex addict, sexaholic, IDIOT, that you had to spend your time with (and you will never get this time back again) as one of the dumb people.
I don't know whether it is an age thing, or that I currently have this feeling that I have a higher purpose and find myself feeling that I am better than most(at least I can admit it), but my tolerance for dumb people is diminishing at a rapid rate.
More and more, I am finding that a lot of people are just dumb; like Mr Sex Addict. What are they contributing? Why is it necessary that we have to tolerate their ignorance and lack of capacity to even comprehend the most basic of concepts?
I am not saying that I am smart. I for one know that I'm not. I have to work really hard at listening and reading to what is going on around me. I have studied for years to improve my knowledge and capacity to learn, but let me tell you, nothing has come naturally at all. The one thing that I have learnt, is to listen, don't speak about things you don't know anything about, if you don't know, say you don't know. Don't just blow your nose to see what comes out and then attempt to use this as an opinion or a suggested solution to a problem.
I work in the finance industry surrounded by university and post grad educated people. They may be "educated", but they are still dumb. The most unfortunate thing is they believe they are smart because they have a degree. I refer you back to Mr Sex addict. Would an educated person with even a minuscule amount of intelligence have made the comments he did? I think not. I work these people on a daily basis and they are presently sucking my will to live.
I appreciate that when you repeatedly ask the same question, expecting to get a different answer, you have to have a hard look at yourself and the way you are asking the questions. I promise that I have done this. Some people are just dumb and are NEVER going to get.
They may be nice people, but they are still DUMB.
I have given this a bit of thought (perhaps you are now thinking that I may be dumb for putting this much thought into the issue), but for some of the apparent dumb people, I don't think it is personal. I have to blame the "system" a bit. Again, this may be the age thing.
I recall when I wanted to go to uni we had to work our arses off to get decent marks, and then when we graduated, we had to fight with 1000 other people for 3 positions. After finally securing a position for a meagre salary, we were grateful that we got to photocopy, file and work weekends. It's not like that today. OK I feel old when I say this (I am only 36), but it is different. Gen Y, what ever you want to call it, they have gotten everything they bloody want. They were never allowed to fail because it was would make them feel bad and if they wanted a job, we gave it to them. We pay them ridiculous amounts of money in anticipation that they may contribute something positive, and if they don't perform, we give them what they want now anyway because you never know, they may actually do something - we don't know what, but they have good qualifications!!!! (Actually I have to question here who are the dumb ones?) Cynical and simple I know, but that is my reality.
I realise I am not going to change the world and the education system of today, but it is different, and they have to take some responsibility for contributing to the increasing number of dumb people in society today.
Then to top it all off - dumb people breed. This is the all bad part.
As you would agree with me, we are generally attracted to similar people to ourselves. It is not too often that you find a well educated, intelligent person with a dumb one. The dumb ones are together. Why? because their dumb. And, if a dumb one is with an educated one, you will find their breeding is minimal. Have a look around, within minutes you will agree with me.
The educated people of the world have their one or two children. Great. They appreciate the cost of children, want to provide the most they can to each child, acknowledge the longer term cost of school fees etc etc. Not the dumb people. These days, they have 4+ children. Did they think about incremental cost on the family of having a 4th child? Larger car etc etc. What educated person would buy a Tarago? Or have the need for one?
Ok, so they will get a discount on school fees, but you get this from child 2, not child 4. Ok, you get an extra baby bonus - great, it’s not enough to support the child.
OK, so you love children and want to have more? Why? Isn't the love from 2 children sufficient? Is receiving the love from 4 children going to make you feel better about yourself? Do you truly believe that splitting your love 4 ways is the same as 2 - and I haven't even allowed time with your partner.
The number of dumb people in the world is increasing. Just look around.
Then when all the dumb people grow up, they vote. AAARRRRGGGGHHHH. Dumb people should not be allowed to vote.
I think that we have established that dumb people really have no idea, don't really have the intellectual capacity to make decisions about their own lives, SO WHY ARE THEY ALLOWED TO MAKE DECISIONS THAT WILL INFLUENCE MINE?????
I am all for the American system. Non-compulsory voting. This way, those people that are sufficiently informed can make an educated decision. Dumb people can not do this.
It is not that I am saying that our current Prime Minister is bad, but I have to ask the question - why is he smiling all the time. It is not an easy job, there is a lot of shit going on. I would have to assume that if he had any idea what was going on he wouldn't be smiling all the time.
Dumb people. So many of them have limited forethought as to the implication of their actions.
previous comment continued (sorry if got chopped off the end):
Anyway, that's my soap box. I find dumb people irritating and I wish there were less of them. It is not that I wish badly on anyone, but if you are dumb, don't hold yourself out to be intelligent, and STOP saying "I know" every time someone tells you something.
However, to a later comment that was posted on this blog, you must think of 3 positive things. Being surrounded by dumb people has made be appreciate so much the education that I have, the intelligent friends that continually make me laugh with their witty humour, and the sense of drive I have developed to want to continually learn.
To Mr Sex Addict, I don't like that you are wasting space, but I thank you for being around because it makes me appreciate even more the goods things that surround me.
i thought i was my soapbox!!!! thank you for reading it and for getting it :-) love your work
sar
xxx
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