in that since posting my first one i am now constantly thinking of things i can blog about........so many topics, so little time........and since the real reason (well the one i'm admitting to anyway) for me starting the blog in the first place was to get me writing more (in the hope that my writing a blog will in fact have the inspiration spill over into the sort of inspiration that will help me finish one of the two novels i am attempting to write........), all it's really done is make me think.........about whether or not anyone will read it, like it, comment on it - or worse still will no-one read it and in a week even when i re-read it i think it's utter crap!!!
weird too that i'm studying alcohol and drug addiction and i now think that blogging could itself (in time) become a form of addiction that appears in the manuals and text books for psych practitioners ...................maybe one day it will make an appearance in the DSM IV - wouldn't that be something??
so what i really wanted to write about today was gratitude and this is something that is (in my humble opinion) under rated! i saw Martin Seligman speak sometime ago (he's a professor in the US and largely one of the founders of positive psychology) - he talked about the benefits of practicing gratitude (in some cases he recommends writing a daily journal of at least 3 things you are grateful for that day) - sounds pretty simple, and i guess it is, but the long term effects are kinda neat! simply put doing it has a way of making you think about what's good in your life, even on a crap day i can ALWAYS find something i'm grateful for and 99% of my entries are about people (ie not material stuff).......another plus is when you are having a really bad day and i mean a 'mean reds day' (if you don't know what this means i highly recommend watching Breakfast at Tiffanys!) then looking back over what you've written in the last little while makes you realise that your life is in fact pretty good and that helps..........maybe not in the same way as vodka, or retail therapy but it does, trust me! in fact don't just take my word for it - try it for yourself!
soooo today what i'm most grateful for is this: in mid september whilst in Paris (yes Paris, France) with one of my best friends, i had a bit of a breakdown (hate work, don't want to do finance anymore, boss is an arsehole who wouldn't know what leadership was if it smacked him in the head, can't stand another day there but can't see a way out etc etc - you've all been there) and kinda worked out that when i got back i would 'follow my dream' - this is something i have admired in many people for as long as i can remember, but was (if i'm being honest) a bit too scared to do myself always finding convenient excuses like 'oh my finance job pays too much', 'nobody's going to let a finance chic move into HR' blah blah blah - anyway, i got back from holidays and within 3 short weeks had not only looked for an HR job, but applied for one, and got a different one!
so a step back in hierarchy and a move out of the 'ivory tower' to a non CBD site and I find myself happier than I've ever been, more comfortable being myself (rather than someone i'm expected to be) and really enjoying working with the people I support.......people who thought they knew me and my motivations were horrified by the move - comments such as 'but you have so much potential' and 'you'll be bored in HR' were commonplace - not that easy to hear when you are following your dream, but you work out pretty quickly who really is a supporter and who's not!!!
so that brings me to today - i find out that after only 11 weeks in the job, a structural change has opened up an opportunity and i'm to be promoted! not only is it a huge professional (and personal) compliment to me but it just confirms what i always knew - that i would be happier doing something i loved and was passionate about (even if initially it meant taking what looked like a backward step).......well done me for not continuing to do what everybody else expected!
it makes me realise that sometimes the best things in life aren't free, they don't come easily and the things we fight hardest for are indeed the most gratifying :-) so thank you to all those people who see my 'real potential, to those of you who have helped me believe in myself and for supporting me in taking a courageous leap of faith........
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